The 'x' factor: is
ending a text with a kiss flirtatious?
Not according to a judge’s recent ruling, but
the letter X can be an ambiguous signoff. Is it best avoided?
Hannah Jane Parkinson
@ladyhaja
Mon 14 Jan 2019 17.44 GMT
In the latest example of digital communications
being
difficult to parse –
at least consistently – a judge has ruled
that ending a text with a kiss (the letter x, that is, not an emoji) does not
constitute flirting. In the case of this family court dispute, a woman’s estranged husband had tried
to argue that it did.
Parse: Describe, analyse
A
woman’s strange husband: A man who has divorced his wife
There is yet to be a universal established etiquette for digital
communication, which is why people at the start of relationships screen-grab
their paramour’s texts and forward
them to their besties with: “BUT WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!”
Or why you might spend an entire afternoon panicking in the loos, trying to work out whether
your boss was being curt in an email or was just pressed for time (to take a totally random example that
definitely did not happen).
There
is yet to be: Still not exists
Bestie: Your bestie is your best friend.
Paramour: Someone's paramour is their
lover. Lover, mistress.
Forward: Send
Panicking: Be frightened
Loos: A loo is a toilet. ...public loos
Work out: If you work out a solution to a
problem or mystery, you manage to find the solution by thinking or talking
about it.
Be curt: “I’m sorry to be curt, but let's
get right to the point. You should use the adjective curt to describe a way of
speaking that’s brief and blunt” .Curt often just means "terse." In
fact it comes from the Latin word curtus, which means “cut short, abridged.”
But sometimes it has the added sense of being rudely short, like when you’re
irritated that someone’s asking a stupid question so you give a brusk, curt
response.
Pressed
for time:
Quickly.
Kisses are a particularly ambiguous signoff. It’s a bit like hugs and air kisses in real life:
some consider them a casual, tactile greeting, while
others believe them inappropriate and overfamiliar.
But the judge’s ruling in the aforementioned case hits the nail on the
head: it is all about putting it into the context of the individual,
their consistent style and personality.
Sign off: To stop talking (slang)
Greeting: A greeting is something
friendly that you say or do when you meet someone.
Aforementioned: If you
refer to the aforementioned person or subject, you mean the person or subject
that has already been mentioned.
Hits
the nail on the head: To do or say whatever is exactly right or to the point
If someone always signs off with a kiss, it is
safe to assume that they are not IRL puckering up. But if
your usually buttoned-up colleague starts ending
emails with an X, it’s time to make a move – whether that be to a restaurant,
or the other side of the office.
IRL: In real life
Puckering
up: to
contract the lips as in preparing to kiss
Buttoned-up
colleague: A colleague who is reserved, taciturn.
The problem is with people who scatter the letter x around freely,
as if they have drawn a bad hand at Scrabble.
Teenagers can put so many emoji and Gossip Girl-style xoxo’s
in everyday texts that when they want to express real affection, they have to use uninspiring
gifs of people making a heart sign with their hands. There are whole threads
online dedicated to decoding the number of kisses at the ends of messages, and
even debating whether lowercase or a capital are significant.
Scatter: If you scatter things over an
area, you throw or drop them so that they spread all over the area.
Freely: Freely means many times or in
large quantities. If you can talk freely, you can talk without needing to be
careful about what you say.
Xoxo: Hugs and kisses. O=Hug X=Kiss If
you look at each letter like it was representing two people from a bird's eye
view, the "O" represents the arms of those persons hugging each other
while the "X" is evocative of two people kissing each other.
Perhaps the safest way to flirt in a message,
then, is just to use old-fashioned words. “I like you,” for example. Anything
but a dick pic. X
READER’S COMMENTS
-Juniper18
Putting x at the end of a text message can mean
several different things, often it is used to signify that the message you are
sending may sound tense/abrupt but it is well meant. I must
admit I didn't like it too much when a female friend of my husband's ended her
texts to him about ordinary stuff with an X - my first thought was why are you
sending kisses to my husband? That must have been what the painter and
decorator wondered about me when I realised that I had ended a text to him with
not one but two xx's - forgetting who I was texting.
Well
meant: Well
intentioned
-OrangeHat
I don't use kisses on messages to the man I'm
marrying, but in planning a wedding I've discovered it's the norm for
bride-supplier relationships! My photographer, makeup artist, seamstress and venue manager all
finish every message with at least one x and I've found myself matching them in
response.
Seamstress: A seamstress is a woman who
sews and makes clothes as her job.
Venue: The venue for an event or activity is the place where
it will happen.
-NotQuiteEither
Dick pics are the worst, just FYI.
I think men forget that penises are only really
attractive if you're in the mood (and usually in person!). An uninvited picture
out of the blue of what is usually not a particularly pretty body
part can be one hell of a turn off.
Out
of the blue: If something happens out of the
blue, it happens unexpectedly.
One hell
of a turn off: ???
Hell: In some religions, hell is the
place where the Devil lives
Turn
off: Informal.
Something causing sexual repulsion
-Possummassala
It is. [a British thing] Never met another
nationality that does it (or at least, not beyond primary school age (that’s
not meant to be insulting - just an acknowledgement that I have seen xx or xox
from non British primary age kids, but never older))
Funny thing is the British aren’t amongst the
kissiest of cultures in real life. Just comes out in writing.
Cap comentari:
Publica un comentari a l'entrada